NFL Draft (the REAL one)

Issue: Day 1 is over, any thoughts?

Short Answer: Too many to fit into one post, and most have nothing to do with football.

Reasoning: I have written about mock drafts on this blog before.  But, when the draft finally does arrive, mock drafts and the people who compile them, make my blood boil.  Day one of the NFL Draft has come and gone (so has day two), and the only thing I can tell you is I can't wait until Todd McShay, Adam Schefter, and Mel Kiper (and Chris Mortensen and Chris Berman for that matter) go do...whatever it is they do when they aren't "breaking down film," or "grading players," or "doing anything worthwhile."  I guess it speaks to the American public's obsession with having to know everything, not as it happens, but before it happens, that people like McShay, Schefter, and Kiper have jobs.  And well-paying jobs at that (I'm guessing).  Let me make this simple: would you ever want to go have a beer with any of the three "analyists"?  It could be fun for awhile, but seriously, how annoying would they get?  Check please.

Now, let me make this clear, I do not blame the douchefecta (it's shorter than typing all three of their names every time) for completely bombing their mock drafts (I realize Schefter doesn't do mock drafts, but I can't stand him, so I am grouping him in with the two others, who I also can't stand).  Picking a draft correctly, before it actually happens, is like hitting a lottery where you have to pick 32 numbers out of an unlimited pool of numbers.  I did the math on this, and the odds are: 1 in a crapload.  It is absolutely, positively impossible.  Yet, each member of the douchefecta (it is starting to grow on me too) is paid a hefty salary (again, I'm guessing) to tell the sports-watching American public who is going to pick who, and when.  How has it come to this?  How has ESPN been able to shove this sort of thing down our throats?  Mock drafts never end, and every single one of them is complete crap, so why are people paid to compile them?

Take, for example, the mock draft put together by Todd McShay, esteemed member of the douchefecta, on February 10, 2011.  Yes, that's correct, I said February.  I'm not sure why they are doing mock drafts in February (or ever, if you haven't noticed) either.  How can I get a job like this?  Anyway, on February 10 McShay published this piece, with Clemson DE Da'Quan Bowers going #1 overall to the Panthers.  In reality (not in mock draft fantasy land) Bowers was finally taken in the second round by the Buccaneers, with the 51st overall pick.  Now, there are reasons for the discrepancy, first and foremost, concerns over a lingering knee injury.  But, isn't that reason enough to scrap the mock drafts?  You have to think the reason the douchefecta works so hard at what they do is so they don't look like complete idiots in front of the entire world.  Too late.  Anytime you project a player to be picked first, and he goes 51st, you should automatically be fired.  Or tarred and feathered.  Or both. 

To give credit where credit is due, both McShay and Kiper did nail the #1 pick.  They both (in their latest mock drafts, that is) had Cam Newton going to the Panthers with the first pick.  And that, after hours, days, weeks, and months of work, is about the only thing either of them got correct.  When do the 2012 mock drafts start?  I bet Kiper has one coming out on Monday, if he doesn't already have one out.  Sad.