Bow Tie Cause

Issue: I thought this was a sports blog - are you giving fashion advice now?

Short Answer: If you've ever seen my wardrobe, you'd know that's not the case.

Reasoning: I've never worn a bow tie (other than clip-ons for tuxes I've worn in weddings), and I've certainly never owned a bow tie.  I think they can look fashionable, but I usually think the people wearing them are just trying hard to be different (i.e., they are nerds).  Ken Rosenthal may fit the definition of a nerd, but I'm not sure Dhani Jones does.  But, the two of them have teamed together for what is called "Bow Tie Cause".  Starting at the beginning of this year's MLB season, Rosenthal donned a different bow tie for each of Fox's Saturday Game of the Week.  Each of the bow ties raised awareness for various charities.  The website bowtiecause.org explains each bow tie and the charity which Rosenthal and Jones are helping to raise awareness for.  The 9/11 Memorial Fund, ALS, Cystic Fibrosis, and Ovarian Cancer are just a few of the causes that Rosenthal and Jones have represented.  You may be asking yourself, "what the heck does this have to do with this blog, other than the fact that Rosenthal wore these during baseball games and Jones was a former NFL player (he was a former Bengal - and an average one at that)?"

Well, ladies and gentlemen, one of the ties Ken Rosenthal wore, in Game 5 of the World Series no less, holds a place near and dear to my heart.  Let me show you the tie first:

Pretty sharp looking tie, no?  Well, this tie benefits the St. Xavier High School retention fund.  Yes, St. Xavier High School is my alma mater, I coach varsity baseball there, and, it is the best high school around.  Deal with it.  Allow me to let Fox Sports explain the significance of the charity:

St. Xavier High School assists young men to become leaders through rigorous college preparation in the Jesuit tradition. The school, whose motto is "Men for Others," created its retention program to assist non-traditional students to reach their full potential — academically, socially, spiritually and personally. The subtle X in the pattern of the bow tie reflects the school’s Long Blue Line tradition, while the geometric design represents the Jesuit approach to leading within complex, changing environments. Designed for the school's annual gala (Xtravaganza), the signature St. X BowTie helped raise over $30,000 to support the program. Dhani visited the school and taught students how to tie a bow tie.

Awesome.  St. Xavier High School made an appearance in the 2011 World Series.  I'm not sure many (if any) other high schools out there can make the same claim.  Makes me proud to be a Bomber.  Oh, who are we kidding?  Bombers are always proud to be Bombers, that's why people don't like us so much.  There is also some video of Rosenthal wearing the St. X bow tie, as he interviewed the Mets' Scott Hairston after a July 16 game in Shea Stadium.  The bow tie only makes a quick appearance at the beginning of the video, so, instead of posting a video with an interview of a player most people have never heard of, after winning a meaningless game in July, for a team that absolutely stunk (unless they were playing the Reds), I will just post a picture:

Again, awesome.  Here's to Ken Rosenthal and Dhani Jones raising money for numerous good causes, including a few that are near and dear to my heart, especially giving non-traditional students the chance to experience St. Xavier High School.  Go Bombers!

The Little Summer Classic

Issue: How much do you love the Little League World Series (hereinafter LLWS)?

Short Answer: You might be surprised.

Reasoning: I think the LLWS stinks.  Now, before you start calling me a cynic, please, let me explain.  In fact, allow me to parse it out, so everyone can understand why I think it stinks (notice I said "I"...I am not trying to convince anyone that it stinks, because I realize a lot of people enjoy watching the LLWS, for some odd reason).  How about a "pro" and "con" list:

PROS:

1. What an experience for a bunch of 12-year old kids.  There is a team in the LLWS this year that is from Pennsylvania, in fact, they are only about 40 miles from Williamsport (where the LLWS is held), and, you know how many people were in attendance for their first game?  Over 41,000.  No joke.  Could you imagine being 12 and playing in front of that many people?  A few times in my career I was lucky enough to play in front of 10,000+ people.  It was an experience I wish I could put into words, but I can't.  Let's just say, in a sports context, it was the coolest thing that I have ever done.  To put it simply, those kids will never forget that game.  Ever.  My point to this post is not that the LLWS should cease to exist, just that it should cease to be on my TV.  Forever.
2. At least these kids are playing some sort of baseball and aren't sitting in front of the computer or TV.  I give them credit for that.  That is the last entry on the list of "pros."

CONS:

1. Let's just say, hypothetically, you could find the abosolute, very best 12-year old baseball players in the entire world.  About 30 of them.  Then, you split them into 2 teams and played them against each other.  There is still no freakin' way that I would want to watch it.  Why?  Because they are freakin' 12-years old.  Hell, if I ever have kids, it is going to be painful having to watch them play baseball when they are 12.  Really?  Watching 12-year olds play baseball is fun?  No, not a bit.
2. Little League baseball is a joke.  Do you realize why a team with a dominant pitcher always wins?  It's because the pitcher's mound is about 6 feet away from home plate.  A dominant Little League pitcher throws the equivalent of a 6,257 mile per hour fastball.  Not only can you not hit that, you can't even see it.  It's like fast-pitch softball without chicks in shorts, instead you have 12-year old boys.  Only Herbert from "Family Guy" likes that trade-off.
3. Little League baseball is a joke, part II.  Is there a reason the players can't lead off?  Is this a safety issue?  Or is it the fact that if leadoffs were allowed, even the fat kids could steal bases, because the bases are only 60 feet apart?  Again, what we have here is fast-pitch softball played by 12-year old kids, on a mini-baseball diamond.  Fact is, leadoffs and baserunning in general are often undercoached and misunderstood (ever watch the Cincinnati Reds run the bases?).  If kids aren't leading off at age 12, learning it later is going to be difficult, because other kids not playing Little League have been doing it their whole lives.  It makes no sense.
4. Little League baseball is a joke, part III.  Have you ever wondered why there are so many home runs hit in Little League baseball (unless, of course, there is a pitcher throwing 6,000+ mph)?  It's because the fences are 200 feet.  I could find 8-year olds that can hit a baseball that far.  The home runs these kids hit are outs in real baseball (meaning not Little League baseball).  Lazy fly balls.  Yet, I see these kids hit a 215-foot fly-ball, and pimp it.  It's a can-of-corn, deal with it.
5. Little League baseball is antiquated.  The Little League game is not played by the best amateur players anymore.  The total number of Major League players that played Little League baseball?  31.  The total number of those 31 Major League players to play in the LLWS?  23.  The LLWS was founded in 1947.  That means, people who tune into the LLWS see, on average, 1/3 (yes, that says "one-third") of a future Major League player, every single year.  Sweet.  The most recent Major League player to have played in the LLWS?  Lastings Milledge, who appeared in the LLWS in 1997.  At 12-years old, these kids should be playing baseball on bigger fields, a regulation pitching mound, while leading off and running the bases the proper way.  Playing Little League baseball only serves to stunt the development of players.  And in a game like baseball, it's hard to catch up.

Now, I know some of you out there might think I am being a little harsh, you know, bagging on a bunch of 12-year olds, but, I want you to know, I'm not bagging on 12-year olds kids, I'm bagging on 12-year old kid's parents, for being dumb enough to sign-up their 12-year old kid for Little League.  Idiots!

Updates on Previous Posts

Issue: You actually have anything worth updating?

Short Answer: Ehh.  Maybe.

Reasoning: I haven't been watching much in the way of sports lately.  Turns out this "work" thing kind of gets in the way.  Oh, that and "playing golf" seems to get in the way as well.  So, with the College World Series just ending, the Reds playing average baseball, Wimbledon coming to an end, and millionaire football players not getting along with their billionaire bosses - I'm not sure there is much to write about right now anyway.  So, I am going to update you on the recent happenings relating to some of my older posts.  It is much more interesting than it sounds, trust me.  Here we go:

1. At the end of January I wrote this post about how awesome Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal are.  At the end of the post (go ahead and scroll down, it's ok) I wrote a "runner-up" for the Odd Stat of the Week, which stated that Roger Federer was 166-0 in majors, when winning the first two sets.  Through the first four rounds of Wimbledon, he had run his record to 178-0 (this included this year's French Open as well).  However, Federer's record now sits at 178-1 after losing to Jo-Wilfried Tsonga (3-6, 6-7, 6-4, 6-4, 6-4) in the Quarterfinals at Wimbledon.  You knew it was coming sooner or later, but I don't think anyone thought the streak would end with a loss to world powerhouse Jo-Wilfried Tsonga.  Roger is just getting old.
2. In early March, at the height of the Charlie Sheen scandal(s), I wrote this post about his association with the Cincinnati Reds.  Charlie Sheen, ladies and gentlemen, is still at it.  In the upcoming Sports Illustrated magazine, Sheen admits "that he took steroids 'for like six or eight weeks' while filming the 1989 movie 'Major League.'  He adds that the performance-enhancing drugs helped his fastball go from 79 mph to 85 mph."  Talk about dedication.  The man played a Major League player in a movie, so, he figured he would do everything a true Major Leaguer does.  Including steroids.  I love that his fastball gained 6 mph of velocity, going from "batting practice" to "ridiculously hittable."  And, all he had to pay for it was some bacne (a shorthand word combining back + acne) and a few mood swings.  Sheen even admitted the steriods "made him a bit more irritable than normal."  That seems a bit scary.
3. At the beginning of May I wrote this post, challenging a top-10 list of the worst sports movies ever.  I disagreed with a few, and wrote my opinion on what makes a good sports movie.  Well, I watched a sports movie the other day that belongs on, or near, the top-10 list of worst sports movies ever.  And I'm sure most people will think I'm crazy.  Remember the Titans is downright awful.  The underlying message is great, and the director did a great job showing how difficult the times were for all students, black and white.  But, outside of that, it has to be the cheesiest sports movie EVER.  Hands down.  Seriously, watch the movie strictly from a sports standpoint next time.  It's a joke.  There is a lot of singing, a lot of dancing, and a main character (Gerry Bertier - played by Ryan Hurst) who doesn't do one thing in the movie that ISN'T cheesy.  Do me a favor and watch any part of the movie where the team is "dancing" during warm-ups or when they come up with their new "hip" entrance to the field - and watch only for Ryan Hurst.  It is absolutely hilarious.  Oh, and the fact that the movie is "based" on a true story doesn't mean Hollywood gave you the true story.
4. At the end of April I wrote this post about the NBA and NHL playoffs.  In the post I wrote "Jason Kidd will be the reason the Mavs lose" in the playoffs.  Uhhh, you see why I don't write much about the NBA?  I thought Jason Kidd was terrible.  Turns out, not only is he not terrible, but the Mavericks are the Champions of the NBA thanks in large part to him.  Oh, and that Dirk guy.  No more NBA predictions from me - ever.
5. Finally, back in January I wrote this post about the return of Tiger Woods (then wrote this one about Tiger hocking a loogey on the green, then this one about Tiger losing in the first round of the Match Play Championship, then this one about Tiger at the Masters, then this one about Tiger withdrawing from the Players Championship).  Well, I'm here to report that Tiger is not back yet, and he may not be back for awhile.  If you heard his press conference this week (to promote his tournament - one he won't be playing in) you heard a man who sounds defeated - a man who doesn't believe in himself anymore.  The old Tiger would have sat there and defiantly talked about how he would kick Rory McIlroy's ass once he came back.  But, the new Tiger danced around questions, and used words like "hopefully," "should," and "probably."  The old Tiger would have said "yes," "no," and "kiss my a#& you stupid mother [bleeper]."  Tiger needs a mental coach badly.  He needs someone to build up his ego, because his ego is what separated him from the rest of the golf world.  Back in the day, Tiger didn't think he was the best golfer in the world, he knew it.  If he gets back to that, he'll win again.  If he doesn't, he won't.  For every one's sake, I hope he does.  But, it doesn't sound like he will.  I guess watching Rory will have to suffice for now.

Sports Movies

Issue: What do you think of the list compiled here?

Short Answer: I agree and disagree.

Reasoning: For any athlete (or former athlete) sports movies are usually a point of contention.  Some like certain movies for certain reasons, while others dislike the same movies for different reasons.  I have often considered myself a leading connoisseur of sports movies.  I have often thought about becoming a consultant for actors/directors/producers to help ensure the sports, in sports movies, are played, and portrayed the proper way.  Problem is, I don't live in Hollywood, would never want to, and, I have no idea how to get my foot in the door, or if anyone would listen to me anyway.  Maybe I will just keep writing.  Let me give you a prime example of what I am talking about, dealing with the movie Field of Dreams.

Field of Dreams is a good movie to watch.  It has a good story (although hardly believable), good actors, and good baseball scenes.  But, I would never consider the movie one of the best sports movies of all time.  Why?  Because, ladies and gents, Shoeless Joe Jackson, whom the story in the movie is built around (besides John Kinsella, Kevin Costner's movie father) was a left-handed hitter and right-handed thrower in real-life.  In the movie, somehow, someway, Joe Jackson is a right-handed hitter and left-handed thrower.  No movie with that egregious an error can ever make a list of best sports movies.  So, in the end, in order to be considered a great sports movie, it must have a great story, must be historically accurate, and it must have actors who can portray athletes.  The sports movies that suck are sports movies where the actors don't look like athletes (Major League 2 or Major League 3 anyone?).  The absolute most important thing to have in a sports movie is actors who look like they have actually played the sport.  Some good sports movies (that meet the criteria I mentioned, not an exhaustive list):

1. Hoosiers
2. The Natural
3. Friday Night Lights
4. Rocky I, II, III, IV
5. The Karate Kid (no joke)
6. White Men Can't Jump
7. Tin Cup (with the exception of David Sims, played by Don Johnson - bad, bad swing)
8. The Color of Money

Each movie has actors who actually looked like they have played the sport, plus a compelling storyline to go along with it, which makes them fantastic movies.

The link I provided at the beginning is a top-10 list of worst actors in sports movies, not the worst sports movies.  However, two of their top-3 are way off base.  Tim Robbins as Nuke LaLoosh in Bull Durham, in my opinion, is one of the greatest acting performances of all-time.  The herky-jerky pitching motion used by LaLoosh in the movie is all part of his character and charm.  It completely fits, and, I'm not sure the movie would be the same without it.  Also, Madonna as Mae Mordabito in A League of Their Own was, I thought, fantastic.  The article seems to have something personal against her, because it mentions how distraught she was on set.  Yet, in the movie, she plays a quite credible ball player, you know, for a girl.  The rest of the list I agree with, I think.  Most of those movies I haven't seen, or never would have considered them "sports" movies in the first place.

And now for my list.  Being a former baseball player, and with the plethora of baseball movies out there, I am often asked what my favorite baseball movie is.  Instead, I will give you a top-5, in order, with some memorable quotes (taken from the top of my head, so there may be small discrepancies):

1. Bull Durham
1. Nuke: "I held it like an egg."  Crash: "And he scrambled that son-of-a-bitch."
2. Crash: "Strike outs are boring, plus they're fascist.  Throw some more ground balls, it's more democratic."
3. Skip: "You lollygag around the infield, you lollygag your way down to first, you lollygag in and out of the dugout.  You know what that makes you?  Larry?"  Larry: "Lollygaggers."  Skip: "Lollygaggers."
2. Major League
1. Lou: "They say you're a pitcher.  You sure ain't much of a dresser.  We wear caps and sleeves at this level son."
2. Willie: "What league you been playing in?"  Ricky: "California penal."  Willie: "Never heard of it.  Well, how'd you end up there?"  Ricky: "Stole a car."
3. Lou: "Nice velocity."  Pepper: "Sounded like it."
4. Jake: "Hell of a situation we got here Rexy.  Two on two out you guys down by one.  You have a chance to be a hero on national TV, that is, if you don't blow it.  By the way, saw your wife at the [I have no idea what the name is] Lounge last night, helluva dancer.  And that guy she was with, I'm sure he's a close personal friend and all, but let me ask you this: what was he doing wearing her panties on his head? [Rexman swings and pops the ball up] Uh-oh Rexy, I don't think this one's got the distance!"
3. The Natural
1. Roy: "When I walk down the street, I want people to say: 'There goes Roy Hobbs, the greatest hitter that ever lived.'"
4. The Sandlot
1. Smalls: "Oh, I thought you said, the Great Bambi."  Ham: "That wimpy deer?!?!"
2. Ham: "You mix your weenies with your mama's toe jam!"  Little league kid: "You bob for apples for the toilet, and you like it!"  Ham: "Yeah, you play ball like a girl!"
3. Ham: "You know, if my dog were as ugly as you, I'd shave its butt and teach it to walk backwards."
5. A League of Their Own
1. Ira: "Do you think if I paid you more you could be a bit more disgusting?"  Jimmy: "I could certainly use the money."
2. Ira: "I especially liked the move in the 5th inning when you scratched your balls for an hour."  Jimmy: "Anything worth doing is worth doing right."
3. Walter: "Let me be blunt, are you still a fall-down drunk?"  Jimmy: "That is blunt.  No sir, I've quit drinking."  Walter: "You've seen the error of your ways?"  Jimmy: "No, I just can't afford it."

For the record, movie #6 would be Eight Men Out, which is a great recount of the 1919 Chicago Blacksox Scandal.  Oh, and they have Shoeless Joe hitting left-handed.  Tip of the cap to the producers of that movie for getting something so easy, correct.

Why Censorship Ruins American Televison

Issue: What does that have to do with sports?

Short Answer: Honestly, not much.

Reasoning: But, when I see funny stuff, I am always trying to figure out a way to post it here.  And, I promise this post is about sports.  Sort of.  You see, The Daily Sport is a tabloid "newspaper" published in the dentally unhygienic United Kingdom.  They talk funny too.  I have never seen or heard of The Daily Sport, so, allow me to let Wikipedia (I realize it is not a trusted source, but sometimes they have exactly what I need, and I can't imagine someone would purposely publish false information about The Daily Sport - but it's possible) to do it for me:

"The Sport does not focus on political news or world events...[i]nstead, its news coverage indulges more in yellow journalism, with an emphasis on celebrities, bad behaviour and toilet humour [HA - they spell funny too!]...Recent editorial policy has meant an end to [ridiculous] stories and an increased focus on celebrity news and sexual revelations...The Sport often publishes fake nude pictures of celebrities and also paparazzi "upskirt" and "downblouse" or nipple slip pictures. The fake nude pictures are published with the appropriate disclaimers and captions, although the front cover image is often accompanied by a titillating caption."

Ok.  Maybe that just confused you more.  From doing more research, I have found that The Sport specializes in three things: women's breasts, sports (see, told you it was appropriate for this blog), and funny stuff.  It sounds like whomever came up with this idea had a pretty good idea of what they were doing.  Call me crazy.  So, what does this have to do with censorship and American television?  The following commercial would never, ever, be aired in America (duh).  It is a commercial for The Daily Sport newspaper, and it made me laugh out loud.  All five times I watched it.  I must warn you though, there are half-naked breasts and abrasive words contained in this video.  I know that won't stop my male readers from viewing, but I wanted to warn my female readers (all 3 of them) about the content.  This video is not, however, so over-the-top that it will offend anyone (unfortunately).  Oh, and don't watch it at work with the volume turned up.  Enjoy!

Charlie Sheen

Issue: He has been in two baseball movies (Major League 2 does not count), is that what this post is about?

Short Answer: No.

Reasoning: Charlie Sheen has been in the news a lot lately.  Something about how awesome he and his life are, and, how everyone else is jealous of him.  I don't care about celebrities at all, but, based on how popular reality television, US Weekly, People, and E! Television are, Charlie may not be that far off.  The greatest thing about people falling off the wagon (or, in Charlie's case, jumping back on - again) are the stories from the past that come to light.  Some of these stories are rehashed only because they are hilarious, others may have never been heard before.  And, a story I have never heard before, about Charlie Sheen, is why this post was written.

You see, Charlie Sheen is a big Cincinnati Reds fan (who knew?).  Martin Sheen, Charlie's father, was born in Dayton, Ohio, and lived there until he moved to California.  So, Charlie's first few years on earth were spent in Dayton - which is where his love for the Redlegs comes from.  Now, I'm not sure why a person would leave the utopia that is Dayton, Ohio either, but, some people just don't know a good thing when they have it (if you can't sense my sarcasm here, check your pulse, because you are dead).  The move seemed to have worked out well for both Sheens.  Whatever.  Like many others, Charlie didn't lose his love for his hometown team when he moved across the country.

Flash forward to the late 1980's - early 1990's, when, the Reds are actually good.  Charlie Sheen is a fairly prominent actor, having even starred in "Major League" as "Wild Thing" Ricky Vaughn ("Okay Vaughn.  They say you're a pitcher, you're sure not much of a dresser.  We wear caps and sleeves on this level, son.").  And this story ran in the Cincinnati Enquirer, which details (kind of) two absolute blow-out parties that Charlie Sheen threw for the Reds when they were in town playing the Dodgers.  I wonder if any of the early-90's Reds are just now having to answer for what supposedly went on at these parties?  In this day in age, your past is hard to hide.  Especially when the guy throwing the parties decides to go crazy 20 years later.

The funny thing is - I can totally picture this.  I can see Sheen with the Nasty Boys (Charlton, Myers, Dibble) going so far beyond sobriety that it's not even funny - Charlton especially.  I picture him, shirt off, twirling it around his head, screaming at Eric Davis and Billy Hatcher to drink more beer.  I picture even Sheen shaking his head at ol' Norm.  I picture Piniella in the corner, talking to no one, Budweiser in hand.  I can see Tom Browning and Joe Oliver drinking canned beer and telling each other hunting stories, both greatly exaggerating their kills.  And, if there were hookers there, I can see any and all of the players partaking in the festivities.  I am from the school of thought that famous people caught cheating are just the one's who are dumb enough to get caught.  That before the internet, and Facebook, and Twitter, and blah, blah, blah, things like this went on more than one would think.  Today, pictures from parties like this would be posted on some social networking site in real time.  I'm sure athletes today are jealous of athletes of yesteryear, i.e., the good ol' days, when a married athlete could have a hooker at Charlie Sheen's house and not have to worry about it become public knowledge in 3.6 seconds (not that I condone that sort of thing).

I can also picture the Reds' players faces today, 20 or so years after the parties actually took place, looking like a deer caught in the headlights, wondering how these parties are being talked about again.  Charlie Sheen strikes again.

An Editorial

Issue: Isn't your entire blog an editorial?

Short Answer: Details, details (i.e., I couldn't think of a better title for this post).

Reasoning: I am not what anyone would call a true "fan."  I spent most of my life playing baseball for what I considered some fairly good teams.  Hence, the only team I really ever rooted for, were teams that I was playing on.  Sure, I root for the Bengals and Reds, but I don't live and die with their wins or losses.  I would just rather see them win.  I also root for the Buckeyes because most of my family went there, and I root for the Yellow Jackets because I went there.  When any of these teams win, I am happy.  When any of these teams lose, it doesn't affect me one way or the other.  Like I said before, I am not a true fan.

Over the years of watching sports I have figured out there are only two situations in which I truly root for a team: 1) when I have money on the game (and, yes, sometimes I bet only to have a rooting interest in an otherwise lame-ass game); and 2) when that team is playing against the University of Cincinnati or the University of Georgia (the Pittsburgh Steelers too, but I already covered that here).  I believe situation #1 is self-explanatory, plus, I don't want to get into my gambling habits right here and now.  The second situation may need some further explanation (especially since I am from Cincinnati).  I didn't choose to hate either Cincinnati or Georgia - they made me do it.  See, I grew up in Cincinnati during the era of Bob Huggins and his 0% graduation rate (alright, maybe, just maybe, Keith Gregor graduated - I will have to check the records).  Huggins' teams of the 1990's were made up of some of the worst characters ever to grace a basketball court.  Kenyon Martin, Dontonio Wingfield, Art Long, Rueben Patterson, Melvin Levitt, Danny Fortson, Bobby Brannen, and Steve Logan are just some of the players I could not relate to, nor root for.  When I went to college in 1997, at the heart of the "Bengals-are-the-worst-team-in-the-NFL" era, most of the crap I took from the Georgians I played with was because I came from a city that put the Bearcats on the floor during the college basketball season.  Which, is not that surprising.  Let us also not forget the fact that UC finally had a good year in football in 2009 (1 in 100 or so isn't too bad, right?).  Since UC fans had no idea how to handle prosperity, they started sporting "Buckeye State" t-shirts where the "uc" in "Buckeye" was the UC emblem.  That's right, after Ohio State dominates football for 100 years in this state, UC fans claim the Bearcats have taken over after one good season, which will probably be their last good season.  Or one can hope.  Let's not forget that UC got embarrassed by Florida in the Sugar Bowl that year, and, of course, Ohio State beat Oregon in the Rose Bowl.  I could write for another week about my hatred for UC, however...

I hate the University of Georgia even more.  Now, this hatred comes more from playing against them for four years in college.  The truth is, I started hating Georgia because I went to Georgia Tech, and, well, we were supposed to hate them.  But, after playing against them a few times, especially in Athens, I learned that I really do hate them.  I can remember one game, at Georgia, that I was playing right field.  There were stands behind the right field fence where students would get drunk and rag on the right fielder (I'm convinced that was the ONLY reason they were there).  At other schools, I enjoyed this, because the fans were creative and funny (in fact, at Duke, they were making me laugh so hard I started talking to the fans behind the fence and they told me to come have a beer with them after the game - wish I could have).  Georgia students were not.  They came up with nothing new and nothing original (shocking, I know).  They did however almost hit me with a baseball (during the game) and chucked ice and beer cans on the field when they won the game in the bottom of the ninth inning.  The only solace I had is that we were better than them in every sport when I was there.  I remember leaving my house shortly after Thanksgiving dinner my senior year to drive 8 hours to Athens, so I could be at the GT v. UGA football game that Saturday.  My baseball teammates and I wore our GT letter jackets all around campus that weekend, thinking people would start trouble with us.  Not even close.  Not only did no one say anything to us, they did nothing after we beat the hell out of them in their own stadium, and, tore down the hedges that surround the field.  I.  Hate.  Georgia.  (Credit where credit is due: UGA does have a strip club literally across the street from campus (awesome when you are 19), and tons and tons of hot chicks (although, they go to Georgia, so they are also not smart (which can be good or bad, I guess)).

Some may wonder what prompted this post.  I had to find out a way to post the following picture of a typical University of Georgia fan.  Sick.

Go Dawgs!

Women's Lib

Issue: Women's sports again?

Short Answer: Kind of.

Reasoning: I remember an episode of Seinfeld called The Subway, in which Elaine is on her way to a lesbian wedding in which, she, is the best man.  While on a crowded subway, Elaine engages in a conversation with another woman, who is standing next to her.  The conversation went something like this (from memory only - my apologies if this isn't exactly how it went):

• Woman on Subway: I remember 20 years ago when a man would give up his seat for a woman!
• Elaine: Yeah,  It's kind of ironic.
• Woman on Subway: What's ironic?
• Elaine: Women's lib.  We have spent all these years fighting for equality, but we have lost a lot of the "niceties" that went along with being a woman, like having a man give up his seat for you.
• Woman on Subway:  No.  What does "ironic" mean?

A story came my way this week (thanks to my brother (yes, again) and my good buddy Doug, both of whom sent me the same link within 15 minutes of each other) that gives another example of women's lib gone bad.  The story is out of Des Moines, Iowa, where a star wrestler was on his way to compete for (and possibly win) a state title.  Joel Northrup finished his regular season with a 35-4 record and was one of the favorites for the 112-pound (which is what I weighed in approximately 2nd grade) state title.  But, Northrup forfeited his first match of the state tournament allowing his opponent to move on to the next round.  Why?  Because his opponent was a freshman from Cedar Falls named Cassy Herkleman.  Yes, Cassy is a girl.  And a decent wrestler.  She finished her season with a 20-13 regular season record, is one of two girls who have ever qualified for the Iowa wresting state championship (the other also qualified this year), and, is now the only girl to have ever "won" a state championship match.

Northrup's own words as to why he couldn't compete against Cassy:  "Wrestling is a combat sport and it can get violent at times...[a]s a matter of conscience and my faith I do not believe that it is appropriate for a boy to engage a girl in this manner. It is unfortunate that I have been placed in a situation not seen in most other high school sports in Iowa."  (How about ANY other high school sports in Iowa.  Especially a full-contact, full-gouging, full-grabbing sport.)  Now, Northrup, whether he is extremely religious or not, chose a perfect excuse as to why he couldn't wrestle.  I'm not saying he made it up to escape wrestling, and possibly losing to a girl, but, in this day-in-age, questioning someone's religious beliefs puts you in the same category of bigots, as racists.  So, most everyone, including all interviewed for the article, said they not only supported Northrup, but admired his conviction.  I don't question Northrup's religious beliefs, but I do question him not competing.  See, I think everyone would agree that it is not appropriate "for a boy to engage a girl in this manner," but, somewhere along the line, women and the Iowa High School Athletic Association, decided differently.  They decided that since there isn't girl's wrestling, any girl who wanted to wrestle, would do so with the boys.  That is the only "fair" way.  And being fair (or politically correct) is where this thing went completely array.

You see, in my opinion, equality means that all parties have equal bargaining power, i.e., no one has the upper-hand.  Equality has been wonderful for women, in every outlet, since it began in the mid-1800's.  Even within the world of sports, Title IX gave women equal athletic scholarships to men (you can see my opinion on that here).  But, I wonder how anyone can think that allowing a girl to wrestle with boys makes anything equal.  Let us think for a moment about the 20 young boys who lost to Cassy this year.  How do you think they are being treated by their 16-year old classmates?  Do any of my male readers out there remember how girls made you feel when you were 16 (and possibly still today)?  Do any of you remember the changes you were going through at that age?  Could you now imagine being that age and being asked to wrestle on a mat, with a girl, both of you barely clothed, and grab, pull, grope, squeeze, and hold on tight?  No Thanks.  Joel Northrup was in an absolute no-win situation.  If he wrestles and wins, he was supposed to (and he violates his religious beliefs).  If he wrestles and loses, he makes history.  And not in a good way.  (sidenote: Cassy did not win.  She may have been the first girl to move on to the second round of the state tournament (an accomplishment that should not go overlooked), but she only did so by default.  I hope the "record book" denotes that fact.)

I hope I am not admonished for what I am about to say, but here goes anyway - women are NOT equal to men in sports [as I duck and cover].  In everyday life there is no doubt that a woman can do anything and everything a man can do.  In the sports world a woman can do everything a man can do, except, you know, dunk over Kevin Garnett, hit a homerun off of Roy Halliday, tackle Adrian Peterson, win the Masters, etc.  Women have their own sports because they cannot compete on a level with men.  And, in a circumstance where a woman can possibly play with the men (Annika Sorenstam and Billy Jean King, maybe) we should let them dominate women's sports instead of making them a sideshow attraction in men's sports (we didn't go around looking for a new species of athlete for people like Babe Ruth, Michael Jordan, and Tiger Woods to compete against - we just let them dominate, and enjoy the ride while watching).  In a case where there is no women's equivalent sport, e.g., wrestling, maybe, just maybe, we should encourage girls to pursue a different sport.  Because allowing girls and boys to compete on the same playing field in a sport like wrestling, for better or for worse, equal or not, is completely unfair.

Nick Lachey (I Kid You Not)

Issue: Dude, please don't tell me that you are writing about teen idols now?

Short Answer: Only if relevant.

Reasoning: Many of you readers out there that are from Cincinnati, know that many in this city claim Nick Lachey as a hometown hero (I do not.  Boy-band members never count on my list of heroes.  Pete Rose, yes.  Nick Lachey, no.).  However, back in the day when Jessica Simpson was still relevant (and smokin' hot) I did tune into her and Nick's reality show on MTV occasionally (dude, she was REALLY hot back in the day), and I gained some newfound respect for Lachey.  As hot as Jessica was, you could tell how frustrated he was with how utterly stupid she was (and, I assume, still is).  Other than that though, I do not necessarily respect any other "work" that Lachey has done.  But, he is still an outspoken fan of the Queen City, and often wears the gear of the University of Cincinnati, and the Cincinnati Reds and Bengals in public, for the world to see, which I do enjoy.  However, I am always skeptical of a boy-band member's sports knowledge (I mean, really?).  In a post on ESPN.com on February 14, that I'm sure most (if not everyone) missed, Nick Lachey, former member of 98 degrees (haha), showed that he is probably a better general manager than Mike Brown (then again, who isn't?).  Instead of summarizing, I am going to re-post*.  Try to remember that this is Nick Lachey speaking, and, the fact is, I think I agree with everything he says:

Nick, let's start with some background. How long have you been a Bengals fan and what were some of your best and early memories?

Nick Lachey: I've been a Bengals fan for the better part of 30 years. The first season I can remember getting interested in football was the year we went to our first Super Bowl against the 49ers. That was the era of Ken Anderson, Cris Collinsworth, Isaac Curtis, Pete Johnson, etc. That season, two things were born: A lifelong passion for the Bengals and an absolute hatred of the 49ers. They remain a thorn in the Bengals' side.

Who is your favorite Bengal of all time? Why?

Nick Lachey: My favorite Bengal of all time is easily Anthony Munoz. Aside from being the greatest offensive lineman that ever played the game, he is also the Bengals' lone representative in the NFL Hall of Fame. As intimidating as he was on the field, he has always been the most approachable and respectful person off of it. I remember meeting him as a young boy and being shocked by how nice he was to me. As a native Cincinnatian, I have a great deal of respect for how he has embraced our community as well. He has chosen to continue to call Cincinnati home long after his playing days and has done a great deal for the city there. As great as he was as a player, I can easily say he is an even greater human being.

With the high expectations coming in, where would last season rank for you among Bengal disappointments?

Nick Lachey: I think this last year was the most disappointing season in the history of the franchise for me. Certainly there were more pathetic seasons for Bengal fans in terms of record, but none with as many expectations as we had for the team in 2010. I think the most frustrating aspect for me was that we seemed to be in every game, and simply found a way to lose. We never really got blown out but made just enough mistakes and committed enough foolish penalties to take ourselves out of the game. I can handle being soundly beaten by better teams, but beating ourselves was difficult to stomach.

Quarterback Carson Palmer wants out and threatens to retire. Were you surprised? As GM, Nick, how would you handle this situation?

Nick Lachey: I was surprised by Carson's comments simply because he has been so hesitant to step up and say anything in the past. There have been many situations in the past few seasons when you would want and expect your highly paid franchise QB to step up and be the leader of the team, on and off the field. Carson has never been willing to be that guy. He remained silent, seemingly willing to let the chips fall where they may, collect his check and go home. I remember the days of Boomer Esiason, and let's just say I wish Carson had more of Boomer in him. Now, when Carson decides that he doesn't want to deal with it anymore, he finally shows the backbone Bengal fans have long waited to see and makes an ultimatum to be traded or retire. I'm the first to admit that the Bengals can be a tough team to play for at times, but they also made you the highest-paid player in the NFL at the time and you owe it to them and the fans to show some resolve, be a leader and fight through it. Being a very highly compensated franchise QB in the NFL is more than learning terminology and throwing passes. It's about being a leader, and Carson has proven that he cannot be that. If there is a team that thinks he is worth trading for, do it.

Building off that subject, how would you characterize the current state of the franchise?

Nick Lachey: ABYSMAL! Now that I'm done assaulting Carson, let me also explain why I can't blame him for being fed up. Short of the Los Angeles Clippers, who I also happen to be a fan of, the Bengals may be the most poorly run franchise in professional sports. Since Mike Brown has taken over, we've been the laughingstock of the league, all the while supported by a fan base that has refused to give up on the team. After years, even decades of "bungled" draft picks, unfortunate injuries, and off the field embarrassments, I see this as a breaking point for the Bengals and the fans in Cincinnati. People are tired of giving their hard-earned money to a team that seemingly cares more about growing the family fortune than it does about competing for a championship. So many years of futility has created an atmosphere of perpetual losing that no player wants to be a part of, Carson being the latest example. I feel bad for the players and the community that supports them. I think it's time for Mike Brown to admit he's not the football man he thinks he is and hire people who are. As an owner, I think you owe it to the fans who have so loyally supported your team and made you a lot of money in the process to field the best team possible. I think we can safely say that a team that has Mike Brown making personnel decisions is certainly not the best team possible. If he did the right thing and hired someone to take over those duties, he would instantly go from being Cincinnati's public enemy No. 1 to its newfound hero. Hope is a powerful thing, and as Bengal fans, that is all we're asking for.

Lastly, as the most high-profile Bengals fan out there, what message would you have for other Bengals fans who are losing hope?

Nick Lachey: As Bengal fans, we have endured so much over the past 20-plus seasons, with little in the way of satisfaction. We have paid for a new stadium, signed up for public seat licenses and continued to sell out a stadium for a team that has seldom performed to expectations. I have leased a suite for the past five seasons and commuted back and forth from Los Angeles to watch the team I love, many times flying back feeling as if the joke were on me. My message to the fans in Cincinnati would be this -- the power is in our hands. It's time that, as a fan base, we demand more from the team we so passionately love and support. Cincinnati is a rabid football town and we deserve to have a team that cares about winning as much as we do. As hard as it is, the only way we can show our resolve is to quit blindly supporting the same old dysfunctional, losing cycle that is the Mike Brown Bengals. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Albert Einstein said that and he was a pretty smart guy from what I've heard. Bengal fans, don't go insane.

*Thanks to James Walker, author of the AFC North blog @ ESPN.com (full article is above, but here is the link, just in case you want it/need it/don't believe Nick Lachey really said all these things).

Parody at its Finest

Issue: Did you know there is a "fair use" doctrine protecting people from copyright infringement if they use someone else's copyright for purposes of parody?

Short Answer: Yes I do.  And I am thankful.

Reasoning: I am not an internet junkie.  I use the internet for information, gambling, and, well, you know.  Viral videos rarely make appearances on my computer screen, because if everyone else thinks they are funny, then I usually don't.  On top of that, even if a viral video is funny, I don't want to think it's funny, because I don't want to be part of the crowd.  Yes, I know I have problems.

Funny thing is, viral videos are kind of like fraternity guys.  As a whole, viral videos are annoying and stupid.  But, if you carefully choose which videos to watch, they are actually quite funny.  Just like fraternities as a whole are annoying and stupid, but, if you have the opportunity to talk to a fraternity guy solo (you know, without 20+ drunk idiots attached to his ass), he is usually a pretty decent fella.  Usually.

Thanks to my brother Casey (Sigma Phi Epsilon, Indiana University) for sending me this video.  It is a parody of the LeBron James "What Should I Do?" commercial, starring a Brett Favre look-alike.  It is hilarious and it is not copyright infringement (hopefully).  It is also probably not 100% safe for work as a certain part of the male anatomy is discussed quite a bit.  So, maybe just turn the volume down a bit.  Even though everyone in the office will be able to hear you laugh out loud.  Here is the video:

I have watched it six times, and I am still laughing.

2011: A Sport Odyssey

Issue: It is the start of a new year, so, are there any changes you would like to see in sports?

Short Answer: Abso-freakin'-lutely.

Reasoning: I love sports.  Almost all of them (I'm not much of a swimmer).  However, as our times change, maybe, so should some of our sports rules (sidenote: I know ESPN the Magazine did an article on this.  I watch enough sports to have heard announcers talking about it.  However, I did not read it.  I hate ESPN and everything it stands for, save televising sports.  If some of my ideas are similar to theirs (I really hope they aren't), it is by coincidence, chance, or the fact that they have stuck in my head due to hearing said announcers talk about them so damn much).  So, without further ado, here are some of my ideas:

1. The "timeout right before a field goal attempt" rule should continue to be allowed.  I realize this is not a rule change at all.  However, this is one of the ESPN rule changes I mentioned I have heard from announcers over and over (and over and over) again.  ESPN wants to outlaw the timeout right before a field goal attempt.  Why?  I have no idea, I told you I didn't read the article.  I can see no reason why a rule should ever be put in place to tell you when you are allowed to take a timeout.  If I am coaching, I have 2 timeouts left, and I want to use one to ice your kicker right before you snap the ball, then I am allowed.  Deal with it.  Does the 30-second timeout take too long?  Or do we not like it because it sometimes works?  If you can't call a timeout when you want, then what is the point of having timeouts in the first place?  If you don't like it, learn to deal with it.
2. End the Gatorade shower.  Permanently.  If you have ever wondered how this stupid tradition started, well, here's how.  All I am wondering is how we are going to stop it.  "Hey, Coach, we just won a game, so we are going to pour sugar water on you so it makes you sticky as hell for all the interviews you have to go do.  Oh, did we mention it's freezing cold?"  Seriously?  If I was a college coach you would be suspended for the next game (yes, I realize players could get seniors to do it, so I would have a random draw to see who gets suspended), and if I were a pro coach, I would have a fine structure in place depending on liquid used, outside temperature, how cold the liquid used was, etc.  Stop the Gatorade shower, please.
3. Pay college football players.  Most people who are against compensation say it compromises an athlete's "amateur" status.  Actually, amateur statuses (statusi?) became compromised when the NCAA decided to make millions and millions of dollars off of teenage kids.  The sport of football supports entire universities sports programs, and then some.  Some of that money should go directly back to the athlete who is making that money.  Not in the form of scholarship, but as stipend, or wage earnings.  They have earned it.  As Coach Winters (played by James Caan) said in The Program, "when's the last time 80,000 people showed up to watch a [gosh darn] chemistry experiment?!?!"
4. Lose the designated hitter.  Does anyone know why we still do this?  What's next, a designated free-throw shooter for people who aren't adept at shooting free-throws (re: Shaq)?  A designated putter for those golfers who don't like 5-footers?  The designated hitter was a dumb idea when it was implemented, and it is still a dumb idea today.
5. Create a college football playoff.  No explanation needed.  You all should know how I feel about the NCAA by now.
6. No kickoffs after field goals.  Finally one that hasn't been discussed before.  I watch a lot of football, and in doing so have heard that 1) kickoffs are quite dangerous (the NFL outlawed the wedge a year or so ago because of this), and 2) the field goal is overvalued.  My solution solves both problems.  If a team wants to attempt a 50-yard field goal (which would be kicked from the 40-yard line), make or miss, the other team takes over on the 40.  I believe it would add another level of coaching to the mix.  Late in the game with a 1 point lead on the 40-yard line - maybe it's better to punt, or to even go for it, rather than give up the ball in good field position.  How about this: if the team makes the field goal then the team getting the ball will be backed up 10 yards (to the 30), if the team misses the field goal then the team getting the ball will gain 10 yards (to the 50).  I'm starting to like this idea.  If a field goal is kicked from inside the 20, the ball will then be placed on the 20.  Or maybe the other team can choose a kickoff instead.  I have obviously not thought about this enough, but I like it.
7. Penalty strokes for golfers and their bad celebrations.  Golfers are not athletes (I can say this because I love golf).  It shows every time one of them makes a great shot or wins a tournament.  From now on, I propose that golfers be penalized one shot for every bad celebration.  So, if you win a tournament by one you better have a coordinated celebration, or, just calmly shake hands with your opponent, your opponent's caddy, your caddy, and then move on.  Collect your check and get the hell out.  Remember that chip-shot Tiger Woods made at the Masters a few years ago?  The one that rolled down the hill, stopped on the lip for a full second, then fell in?  What do you remember most about that shot?  That it helped him win the Masters again?  Vern Lundquist with another great call at Augusta ("Maybe...Yes sir!")?  Nope.  What I remember the most is the absolutely retched celebration between Tiger and Steve Williams, his caddy.  It may have been the single most awkward moment, not related to sex, in the history of the world.  Could you attempt a high five and miss by a larger margin than they did?  In front of the whole world?  I think not.  Penalty shot for Tiger.  We are heading to a playoff.

I'm sure some of these are dumb, and I'm even more sure none of these "rules" will ever be implemented.  But, I am going to the governing bodies of these sports to present my ideas.  I will.  Just wait.

Ada, Ohio

Issue: Why should any sports fan care about Ada, Ohio?

Short Answer: Every single play, in NFL history, began in Ada, Ohio.

Reasoning: Just so you know, I am from Ohio, I would even say that I love Ohio, and I have never heard of Ada either (even though it turns out I lived not to far from there during the summer I played for the Lima Locos of the Great Lakes Collegiate League).  Google maps tells me Ada is here:

View Larger Map

(I did have to hit the "zoom out" button about 5 times to bring a recognizable city into view, if, you know, Lima is considered a recognizable city.)  Basically, Ada is in the boonies.  Yet, Ada may be the most important town to the NFL in the entire country.  Why?  Ada is home to the factory that has hand made every single football that has been used in an NFL game since the NFL has been around.  Every pass, every run, every touchdown, every field goal, every interception, every fumble has occurred with a football that originated in Ohio.  You gotta love that.

NFL footballs are the only product they make at the factory in Ada.  They also define what it means to have "job security."  Take a look at how it's done (it's amazing):

Pretty cool stuff.

Let's Go Streaking

Issue: What is the greatest streak of all time?

Short Answer: All of them are ridiculous.  Period.

Reasoning: My brother Casey sent my father and me an e-mail yesterday asking what we thought was the most impressive streak of all time, out of the ten he listed.  Starting with the "least" impressive, here is my list:

1. Wayne Gretzky 51 straight games with a point - It's hockey, so who really cares?  Yes, sometimes we let our personal biases affect our decision making.  One can either attempt to not be biased, or just roll with it.  I choose to roll with it.  I love Canada, and Canadians are so nice it is annoying, but have you seen their sports?  Besides hockey, curling is their most popular sport.  And have you seen how they play football?  Plus, I believe this is the most breakable streak of the ten (Sidney Crosby, anyone?).
2. Johnny Unitas 47 straight games with a TD pass - The second most breakable streak out there.  I mean, have you seen Tom Brady play the last few weeks (or years)?  He could go 100 games if he felt like it. 
3. Edwin Moses 107 straight hurdles finals wins - It falls here because a) it seems more impressive than the first two; and b) I'm not really sure how impressive it is.  I have no benchmark.  Anyone know what the next longest hurdles finals streak is?  I thought not.
4. Lance Armstrong 7 straight Tour De France wins - This streak is quite impressive - and even I know it.  This streak probably should be closer to the top (or bottom in this case) of the list.  But, in a sport where the winner is usually the guy who took the most steriods or found an undetectable steriod, any streak becomes less impressive (just like Barry Bonds hitting 73 home runs - doesn't matter that he took more steriods than a world class bodybuilder - it's still impressive).
5. Johnny Vander Meer consecutive no-hitters - Do I think anyone will ever match, or even surpass this streak?  No.  But I watch enough baseball to know it is not out of the relm of possibility that a guy like Roy Halliday, Tim Lincecum, Cliff Lee, or C.C. Sabathia could do this.  At least it is not unthinkable, like some of the streaks lower on this list.  Also, any streak that stops at 2, just doesn't seem that impressive.
6. Cal Ripken 2,632 consecutive games played - I realize that no one will ever sniff this streak.  Too many outside factors in play today.  It is one of the single most impressive streaks out there.  But that's all it is.  Playing in that many straight games doesn't mean anything in the win/loss column neccessarily.  All it means is that you are durable (not a bad thing).  Most of the other streaks on this list translate into wins (or are wins themselves), and this one does not.  Cal Ripken only played (and won) one World Seriers, in 1983, his second year.  Playing a bunch of games in a row is a great feat, but it translates to nothing, other than a great feat.  Plus, it's baseball, how strenuous can it be anyway?
7. Brett Favre 297 consecutive regular season starts - It beats Ripken's streak only because Favre did it in football.  A few more chances to tweak an ankle on the football field.  If there are any other questions, please see above, Ripken, Cal.  Brett Favre only won one Super Bowl, in 1996, his fifth season.
8. Orel Hershiser 59 1/3 consecutive scoreless innings - Let's just take a look at how he did this: on August 30th, 1988, Hershiser finished off a complete game against Montreal (remember the Expos?), with 4 scoreless innings.  His next 5 starts, all complete games: 3-0 over Atlanta, 5-0 over Cincinnati (damn; however, it would be Barry Larkin and the Reds who would eventually snap the streak), 1-0 over the Braves, 1-0 over the Astros, and 3-0 over the Giants.  To break the record, Hershiser threw 10 shut-out innings against the Padres in his next start.  That alone is ridiculous.  The Dodgers went to the playoffs that year, and in his first start Hershiser threw 8 1/3 scoreless innings (which did not count on his streak).  His September stats during the streak: 5 complete games, 55 innings pitched, 30 hits, 34 strikeouts, 8 walks, 5-0 record (duh), and a 0.00 ERA (duh).  This is absolutely one of the top three streaks of all time.
9. Joe Dimaggio 56 game hitting streak - Surprised?  Most people always have this at the top.  And I certainly can't argue that.  So, why do I not have it as the most impressive streak ever?  Because any streak that is subjective (yes, shockingly enough, scorekeepers do cheat for their players sometimes), cannot be number one.  However, the next longest hitting streak in the history of MLB - Willie Keeler, at 45 games, in 1896-97 - was still a full two weeks from tying Dimaggio's record.  Take a look at a few stats pertaining to this streak*: 1) It began on May 15 and didn't end until July 16; 2) Dimaggio's Yankees won the World Series that year and Dimaggio himself won the MVP (Ted Williams hit .406 that same year); 3) Dimaggio had 91 hits in 223 at-bats (.409) during the streak; 4) Of those 91 hits, 35 of them went for extra bases (16 2B, 4 3B, 15 HR) and he had 55 RBI during the streak; 5) He hit safely in another 17 games after his record-setting streak ended (that would have made 74 total); 6) When Dimaggio played for the San Francisco Seals in the Pacific Coast League he had a 61 game hitting streak.  Basically, Dimaggio could hit.  Impressive.  But not as impressive as....
10. Byron Nelson 11 consecutive PGA Tour wins - This is absolutely unbelievable.  It is so unbelievable that the only negative argument I could come up with is the fact that the PGA Tour, then, is not as competitive as the PGA Tour, now.  How many people have won 5 or more in a row?  Two.  Ben Hogan (6 in 1948), and Tiger Woods (5 in 2007-08, 6 in 1999-2000, and 7 in 2006-07).  Notice a few names missing?  Jack Nicklaus, Arnold Palmer, Tom Watson, Lee Trevino, etc.  There aren't enough superlatives to describe how impossible winning 11 tournaments in a row is.  It is downright inconcievable.  How about this: during the 1940's Nelson came in the money 113 consecutive times (Nicklaus has his streak snapped in 1976 at 105), and in the same year he won 11 straight tournaments, Nelson won 18 times.  18 times in a single year.  Unreal.

Please remember, this is just my opinion.  You could invert the list and still make a pretty good argument.  If your name appears on this list, you are good.  Period.

* Most stats taken from Baseball Almanac