NFL Draft (the REAL one)

Issue: Day 1 is over, any thoughts?

Short Answer: Too many to fit into one post, and most have nothing to do with football.

Reasoning: I have written about mock drafts on this blog before.  But, when the draft finally does arrive, mock drafts and the people who compile them, make my blood boil.  Day one of the NFL Draft has come and gone (so has day two), and the only thing I can tell you is I can't wait until Todd McShay, Adam Schefter, and Mel Kiper (and Chris Mortensen and Chris Berman for that matter) go do...whatever it is they do when they aren't "breaking down film," or "grading players," or "doing anything worthwhile."  I guess it speaks to the American public's obsession with having to know everything, not as it happens, but before it happens, that people like McShay, Schefter, and Kiper have jobs.  And well-paying jobs at that (I'm guessing).  Let me make this simple: would you ever want to go have a beer with any of the three "analyists"?  It could be fun for awhile, but seriously, how annoying would they get?  Check please.

Now, let me make this clear, I do not blame the douchefecta (it's shorter than typing all three of their names every time) for completely bombing their mock drafts (I realize Schefter doesn't do mock drafts, but I can't stand him, so I am grouping him in with the two others, who I also can't stand).  Picking a draft correctly, before it actually happens, is like hitting a lottery where you have to pick 32 numbers out of an unlimited pool of numbers.  I did the math on this, and the odds are: 1 in a crapload.  It is absolutely, positively impossible.  Yet, each member of the douchefecta (it is starting to grow on me too) is paid a hefty salary (again, I'm guessing) to tell the sports-watching American public who is going to pick who, and when.  How has it come to this?  How has ESPN been able to shove this sort of thing down our throats?  Mock drafts never end, and every single one of them is complete crap, so why are people paid to compile them?

Take, for example, the mock draft put together by Todd McShay, esteemed member of the douchefecta, on February 10, 2011.  Yes, that's correct, I said February.  I'm not sure why they are doing mock drafts in February (or ever, if you haven't noticed) either.  How can I get a job like this?  Anyway, on February 10 McShay published this piece, with Clemson DE Da'Quan Bowers going #1 overall to the Panthers.  In reality (not in mock draft fantasy land) Bowers was finally taken in the second round by the Buccaneers, with the 51st overall pick.  Now, there are reasons for the discrepancy, first and foremost, concerns over a lingering knee injury.  But, isn't that reason enough to scrap the mock drafts?  You have to think the reason the douchefecta works so hard at what they do is so they don't look like complete idiots in front of the entire world.  Too late.  Anytime you project a player to be picked first, and he goes 51st, you should automatically be fired.  Or tarred and feathered.  Or both. 

To give credit where credit is due, both McShay and Kiper did nail the #1 pick.  They both (in their latest mock drafts, that is) had Cam Newton going to the Panthers with the first pick.  And that, after hours, days, weeks, and months of work, is about the only thing either of them got correct.  When do the 2012 mock drafts start?  I bet Kiper has one coming out on Monday, if he doesn't already have one out.  Sad.

Playoff Hodgpodge

Issue: Any observations from in-and-around the playoffs?

Short Answer: Plenty.

Reasoning: I don't think it is much of a secret around Uncommonly Sports, that I do not particularly like the NBA.  Most of you may not know that I don't particularly like the NHL either, for reasons all too different than my dislike for the NBA.  See, I just can't relate to the NHL.  I have never ice skated (it is a goal of mine in life to die without ever having done so) and my hockey experience is limited to floor hockey during 7th and 8th grade gym class, which, I did dominate, but still didn't enjoy.  Playoff time changes everything though.  I have tuned in to both the NBA and NHL playoffs, and here are some things I have recognized/experienced:

1. Kobe Bryant is whiney b%&ch - I have been able to see quite a bit of the Lakers/Hornets series, because when they play in L.A. the games start at about 3:30 a.m., and I don't usually hit the sack early.  Kobe Bryant is easily one of the top 3 players in the NBA, still.  But, by judging his reactions to whistles, he has never committed a foul in his entire life.  Seriously, every time the whistle blows he looks like a 17-year old boy who's girlfriend just told him that she has been cheating on him (if you have ever seen the movie Hitch, just picture Will Smith's character in his flashback - standing in the rain, crying, saying "Whyyyyyyyy?" when he caught his girlfriend making out with some other dude in a car, and that, is Kobe Bryant when he gets called for a foul).  I have noticed that I have begun to get mad anytime Kobe gets called for a foul, because that means I have to watch him cry/moan/beg.  I want to slap him in the face.
2. Jason Kidd will be the reason the Mavs lose - I watched one of the games that was played in Portland, and Jason Kidd reminded me of myself trying to play point guard.  When I was a sophomore in high school, I was asked to play point guard on the JV basketball team.  To this day I still don't know why.  But, every time I came over half court I was just trying not to turn the ball over.  Jason Kidd looks like he is doing the same thing.  He would cross half court, turn his back to the basket, and begin backing the defender down from 30-feet out.  He is slow and it looked like he realized he was slow and didn't want to look like a fool on national TV.  But I've got J Kidd figured out.  Time to let Jason Terry run the point.
3. The Spurs are old - I'm sure watching the regular season would help me out some here, but, how are the Spurs a #1 seed?  It looks like a collection of octogenarians out there.  Why not bring back David Robinson?  Or George Gervin?  The Spurs may very well come back and win the series, but I don't believe they have enough energy (unless they start taking Centrum Silver vitamins) to make it all the way through the playoffs.  I'd actually like to see Memphis win the series so some of the Spurs might retire.  And join AARP.
4. Hockey players are unreal - I don't understand how they do the things they do (other than years and years of practice).  The game moves so fast (too fast to follow on TV, which is why I don't watch much) and the players are in such control of what they are doing (for the most part) it simply amazes me.  The skill of the players, and that skill alone, is what has drawn me into watching playoff hockey.  If, you know, it isn't televised at the same time as an NBA playoff game.
5. Tip: know where/how to find obscure DirecTV channels - Late last night (around 1 a.m., so, technically I guess it was early this morning) I was watching the Lakers polish off the Hornets to take a 3-2 lead in the series.  At the same time, I was following the Vancouver/Chicago game 7 (Vancouver is the #1 seed, Chicago is the defending Stanley Cup champions) on my stat tracker (I had picked Vancouver in the Streak for the Cash on espn.com) and had realized they had gone into overtime tied 1-1.  I grabbed my remote (because Kobe was whining again) and went to the "Guide."  I knew the hockey game was on the Versus Channel, but, I honestly had zero clue where that channel was on the list.  How many times have I watched Versus?  Last time was probably the NHL playoffs, last year.  I did a quick scan and didn't find it.  So, I went back to the "Guide" and selected "Sports Channels" hoping it would show up in there.  I didn't find it.  Finally, I took a deep breath and did some thinking.  I thought I remembered Versus was in the 600's somewhere.  After hitting "Page Down" a few times, there it was!  Thankfully I got there in time to see the end of the game.  Or so I thought.  As I clicked on the channel I heard the horn going off and the crowd going crazy.  The Canucks had capitalized on a turnover in Chicago's zone and scored the series clinching goal in overtime.  All while I was trying to find the damn channel.  Unreal.

I'm sure I will do this again next week.  Hopefully I will be writing about the Lakers getting swept and Kobe getting smacked in the face by a ref who had had enough.

On a side note, check me out at http://www.examiner.com/mlb-in-cincinnati as I am the new Cincinnati Reds Examiner!  I will be covering Reds news throughout the year (oh, and I get paid based on how many people visit the site, so, don't be afraid to tell every single person you know.  And tell them to tell a few people too.) with news, game recaps, and possibly some interviews too.  That is, if they decide to let me in the clubhouse.  Which I doubt.

The Odd Stat of the Week

Issue: Can we get some more weird baseball stats?

Short Answer: I can make that happen.

Reasoning: Baseball, more than any other sport, is a game of stats.  If you would like to know how often Joey Votto got a base hit, on a 2-2 count, against right-handed pitchers, during night games, on Tuesdays in April, I pretty much guarantee you could find it.  Or, at least, that someone out there is keeping such a stat.  Most novice baseball fans may think the stat keeping is a bit out of hand.  It isn't.  Baseball (kind of like poker) is about the maximization of odds.  See, in a game where if a hitter succeeds 3 out of 10 times, he ends up in the Hall of Fame, stats matter (could you imagine an NBAer shooting 30% from the field, or an NFL QB completing 30% of his passes?).  Baseball is a game of failure, so, managers must put their teams in the best possible situation in order to succeed, and stats help them do that.

Not only are there a million stats out there, some of them are tough to decipher.  Most baseball fans have heard of the stats, but few can tell you what they actually mean.  Take for example:

• Batting average - This stat tells you what percentage of the time a player actually gets a hit.  However, when figuring out batting average, only "at-bats" are used, not "plate appearances."  Walks, hit by pitches, and sacrifices (bunts and flies) count as "plate appearances" but not "at-bats."  Therefore, if a player has 100 "plate appearances" with 25 walks and 25 hits, the player has a batting average of .333 (25 hits in 75 at-bats).
• On-base % - This stat tells you what percentage of the time a player actually reaches base.  Here, all "plate appearances" (not just "at-bats") are used.  Using the example above, the player has an on-base % of .500 (50 times on base in 100 "plate appearances").
• Slugging % - This stat tells you how many bases the player averages per "at-bat" (notice I didn't say "per plate appearance").  The highest slugging % a hitter can actually have is 4.000, if, in fact, he hit a home run every single time he came to the plate.  If a hitter managed a single every single time up, his slugging % would be 1.000 and his batting average would be 1.000 (oh, and he would be the greatest player of all time).  All one must do to figure this stat is add up a player's total bases (1 for a single, 2 for a double, 3 for a triple...do I need to continue?) and divide that number by the total number of "at-bats."  Right now, Troy Tulowitzki is leading the National League (I would have done the Major League leader, but it's Alex Rodriguez and I don't want to say anything good about him) with a .729 slugging % (10 singles, 5 doubles, 1 triple, 7 home runs = 51 total bases/70 at-bats = .729), which means, in essence, that every time Tulowitzki comes to the plate, he will get his team almost 3/4 of a base.  Yeah, baseball is weird.

I tell you all of the above for educational purposes (not real sure I managed that, but, oh well), and to set up the Odd Stat of the Week.  When I first heard the stat, I couldn't believe it.  On Monday, April 18, the Milwaukee Brewers and the Philadelphia Phillies went into extra innings.  After no score in the 10th or 11th innings, the Brewers came to bat in the top of the 12th.  This is what happened:

1. Rickie Weeks walks;
2. Carlos Gomez sacrifice bunts and a throwing error allowed him to reach and Weeks moves to third (official score says, even though there was an error, Gomez is still credited with a sacrifice);
3. Ryan Braun hits sacrifice fly to center, Weeks scores;
4. Prince Fielder hit by pitch, Gomez to second (wild pitch then moves Gomez to third and Fielder to second);
5. Casey McGehee intentionally walked;
6. Yuniesky Betancourt sacrifice fly to left, Gomez scores;
7. Mark Kotsay intentionally walked.

That's right, 7 hitters, 2 runs, 0 official at-bats.  Remember folks, walks, hit by pitches, and sacrifices do not count as official at-bats (plate appearances, yes, at-bats, no).  Those who know and love baseball, know how quirky 7 straight hitters coming to the plate without an official at-bat is.  For those that don't know and love baseball, take it from me, this is crazy.  For the record, the 8th hitter of the inning, Jonathan Lucroy, singled to right scoring Fielder but McGehee was gunned down at the plate to end the inning.  The stat line for the Brewers 12th: 1 hit, 1 at-bat, 3 runs.  I love baseball.

Nepotism is Alive and Well

Issue: Nepotism is not usually condoned most places, why here?

Short Answer: Because it's my blog.

Reasoning: For those of you who are still confused, "nepotism" is defined as "patronage bestowed or favoritism shown on the basis of family relationship."*  Generally, in the "real world," nepotism is frowned upon, as well it should be.  However, when someone writes their own blog, there is no one to stop the favoritism that I am about to bestow on one of my family members, i.e., the first family member to have an entire post dedicated to him (guess that officially rules out my mother, stepmother, and sister - sorry!).  Yes, I have mentioned my brother Casey here numerous times, since he sends me articles and videos that he believes may be appropriate for the blog.  But, I have never written an entire post on him alone.

For those of you who know me and my family, you have probably already deduced who I am talking about: my little brother Michael.  For everyone else (who doesn't know), Michael is the starting shortstop for the Indiana Hoosiers.  They are having a fairly good year so far (24-12, 6-3 in Big Ten), including a win over #23 Louisville last night (they also have wins over then #18 Coastal Carolina and #14 Connecticut).  Currently Michael is hitting .295, with 10 2B, 3 HR, 16 RBI, and a .495 Slugging %.  Not bad for a sophomore (although, I know he will be reading this, so, DUDE - you aren't drawing enough walks.  5 in 105 at-bats?  Stop thinking you need to get a hit every time up and start being a little more selective at the plate).  Indiana has won its first three series in Big Ten play, taking 2 of 3 from Michigan, Ohio State, and Iowa.  They play Minnesota this weekend, which is the consensus best-team-in-the-Big-Ten, unless, of course, Indiana goes in and takes 2 or 3 games from them.  We shall see.

Back to the Ohio State series though.  Indiana dropped the first game of the series 6-1.  Ohio State's pitchers combined to give up exactly 0 earned runs over the nine inning game, and, well, Indiana was never really in it (Michael ended up 1 for 4).  Saturday though, the Hoosiers turned it around.  The score was 5-3 after three innings, and, strangely enough, 5-3 was the final score (could have been an Odd Stat of the Week).  Michael had himself a good one, going 2 for 3 with an RBI and a run scored.  Then came the Sunday rubber match.  Win and you have had a heck of a weekend; lose and you have just dropped a home series to a team that probably will not contend for the Big Ten title (Ohio State is in a down year).  The game was more high scoring than the first two (as per usual on Sundays, when weaker pitchers are generally starting), and ended in crazy fashion.  Indiana came into the bottom of the ninth inning down by 3 runs (9-6).  An error and two singles meant the bases were loaded for the Hoosiers, but, after a strikeout, there were two outs, and they were still down three.  But, as Yogi Berra once said: "It ain't over 'til it's over."  I wish cellphone cameras were around when I was playing baseball, because what happened next can't be explained in words, only in pictures:

Nice job bro.  Man, do I miss playing baseball.

*Dictionary.com