Meet Uncle Drew

Issue: Who is Uncle Drew, and what does he have to do with sports?

Short Answer: Uncle Drew is a playground legend.  Or he will be soon.

Reasoning: As I began writing this post, I was planning on linking the last post I wrote about Uncle Drew.  I went through my entire blog and couldn't find it.  Is it possible I didn't write about Uncle Drew the first time around?  Knowing how dumb I can be sometimes, the answer is positively yes.  It's quite shocking, seeing as how I think this might be the best marketing idea ever.  I will never drink Pepsi MAX, but this video at least makes me respect their marketing team.  Let me post the first video before we continue, so you can get an idea of what I am talking about:

I realize the YouTube title sort of gives the video away, i.e., Uncle Drew is Kyrie Irving of Duke University and the Cleveland Cavaliers.  A couple things jump out at me in this video: 1) Irving does a phenomenal job playing an old guy; 2) Although he is playing against of guys on the playground, it is ridiculous how much better he is than anyone on the court; 3) Everyone is drinking Pepsi MAX, so this had to be set up somehow, someway, and even those watching from the sidelines had to know something crazy was going down; 4) I GET BUCKETS; and 5) They should do many, many, many more of these videos.  I mean, seriously, couldn't Kyrie do this for a living rather than playing in the NBA?  More people would probably see him on YouTube in these videos than playing on TNT versus the Memphis Grizzlies...

Anyway, my wish came true recently when Kyrie Irving and Pepsi MAX released another Uncle Drew video.  This time however, they had Uncle Drew team up with Bill Russell and "Wes", his former teammate from way back in the day.  Since you already know who Uncle Drew is, I challenge you to figure out who "Wes" is.  Since I watch virtually zero NBA basketball, I didn't figure it out until the end, when I felt stupid for not figuring it out sooner.  [Side note: that is the second time I have mentioned how stupid I am in this post alone.  I must be getting old.  Sigh.]  Once again, this video makes me laugh out loud.  I can't wait to see the next one.  I'm still not drinking Pepsi MAX anytime soon though.  That I can promise you.  I GET BUCKETS!!!

Ben Petrick

Issue: Uhh, who?

Short Answer: Just keep reading...

Reasoning: This is what Wikipedia tells us about Ben Petrick:

Benjamin Wayne Petrick (born April 7, 1977) is a former Major League Baseball player.  Petrick, who was born in Salem, Oregon, was a highly accomplished athlete while attending Glencoe High School in Hillsboro, Oregon. He was recruited heavily to play both football and baseball, and ended up going straight into the Colorado Rockies' farm system when they drafted him in the second round (38th overall) of the 1995 amateur entry draft. Petrick became a solid prospect, finding a great deal of success with the Rockies' AAA affiliate, the Colorado Springs Sky Sox. He was called up to the Rockies for the first time in 1999 and hit .323 with 4 home runs in only 62 at-bats. In 2000, he hit .322 in 52 games for the major league club. However, he soon experienced a dramatic dropoff in production, hitting only .238 in 85 games in 2001. On July 13, 2003, Petrick was acquired by the Detroit Tigers from Colorado in exchange for pitcher Adam Bernero. After an unsuccessful stint with the Tigers, Petrick was released. He attempted a brief comeback with the AAA Portland Beavers, and then retired.

This isn't a story about baseball.  This is a story about life.  See, I am a fairly unemotional person (just ask any girl I have ever dated).  I like to think I am always smiling, as I absolutely love life, but very rarely am I moved to tears.  Jim Volvano, in his famous speech at the ESPY's in 1993, told everyone   they should have their emotions moved to tears on a daily basis, but that is easier said than done.  Especially for me.  Perhaps it was because I was raised in a family with 3 brothers and...hold on, who cares why I am that way?  This isn't a blog about me and my emotional deficiencies.  Geez.  Let's move on...

I saw the following piece on E:60, a news show on ESPN.  I have been a baseball guy my whole life, so when I heard the name Ben Petrick, I remembered him, although vaguely.  I recalled him as a heck of catcher, who was turned into an outfielder, who could crush a baseball.  In short, he reminded me of myself (only he was a heck of a lot better than me).  But, then I heard his story and the comparisons to me stopped.  I want you to know that the piece did move me to tears, it is sad, but I promise you it has a happy ending.  I wouldn't post it here if it didn't.  It's a moving story about how sometimes life isn't fair, coping with that fact, and moving on.  You may have never heard of Ben Petrick before today, but something tells me you won't ever forget him.

Leave it to ESPN (yes, I still hate them) to not allow embedding of videos.  Click here to watch the video.

The Wisdom of Tim McCarver

Issue: Uh, Wisdom?

Short Answer:  I was being facetious...

Reasoning:  I have to be honest.  After the Reds were knocked out of the playoffs (by themselves), my attention turned to football.  I didn't watch much of the NLCS or ALCS.  However, the World Series is different.  It's quite possibly my favorite sporting event.  So, last night, with Game 1 starting, I settled on my couch with a cold beer and a high definition television, and I prepared myself to be a bum for the next 3 hours.  Sometimes baseball can be boring (no, really, it can be), so I was thinking of a way to keep it interesting, even in the face of what turned out to be an 8-1 Giants victory.  And then it hit me.  Why not keep track of all the insanely stupid things Tim McCarver says during the game?  Yes, I will need multiple notepads and pens, but let's just see how stupid he can be.  I thought I might be able to fit a whole series worth of McCarverisms into one post, but, after only one game, I may already have too many (plus, I may not always have 3 hours to sit down and listen to everything McCarver says, thankfully).  The following is a list of quotes from McCarver last night.  They are NOT direct quotes, as I wasn't going to take the time to rewind and get it exactly right.  I would hear something, wonder if I was dreaming or tripping, shake my head and write down what I could remember.  Here goes:

• With the Tigers' young outfielder Avisail Garcia at the plate, McCarver noticed that he had his left hand (he's a right-handed hitter) down below the knob of the bat.  McCarver said "you don't see a lot of young guys with the grip off the bat like that.  That is VERY unconventional."  Oh, Tim.  First, it's called cowtailing.  Second, almost every freakin' player does it.  A lot of players actually get tapered knobs on their bats to make it easier to cowtail.  Tim just said this to say this, knowing most people would have no idea one way or the other.
• After Justin Verlander gave up an 0-2 homer to Pablo Sandoval, Tim and Joe Buck quipped that Verlander had probably never given up an 0-2 home run.  Then they checked.  McCarver: "There were 192 0-2 home runs given up this year in Major League Baseball.  NONE were given up by Verlander.  NONE.  NONE.  ZERO.  NOT ONE."  This is McCarver attempting to add drama to something that's not dramatic.  Let's do some simple math.  There are 30 teams in MLB.  Most carry around 13 pitchers in the regular season.  That is 390 pitchers, give or take.  Let's say no pitcher gave up more than one 0-2 home run.  That means almost 200 pitchers DID NOT GIVE UP AN 0-2 HOME RUN THIS YEAR.  And, in case you were wondering, Justin Verlander was one of those 200.  He gave up NONE.
• With Omar Infante at the plate, after he was way out in front of a changeup: "He tried to hook that ball down the line."  Uh, Tim, no one tries to hook the ball down the line, ever.  Hitters try to hit the ball hard, period.  Where it goes, it goes.  Didn't you play baseball??
• After Pablo Sandoval's second home run, and the cameras caught Verlander saying "Wow": "Even a 'wow' from Verlander!"  Wrong "wow" Tim.  Verlander was shocked that the ball left the yard, not at how awesome Sandoval is.
• After an unconventional double play where Delmon Young dribbled one in front of the plate, was tagged by Buster Posey, who then threw to second where a tag was applied to Prince Fielder: "Delmon Young refused to run to first.  Had he run, Posey would have had to go to second to get the force and it's doubtful they would have been able to turn two."  He didn't refuse to run, he thought it was going to be foul.  Doubtful they would have turned two?  Have you seen Young and Fielder?  That would be like turning two on the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man and the Pillsbury Doughboy.  Pretty sure they still had time.
• After a commercial break, McCarver continued about the same play.  He explained that if Young had run, the ball would have hit him in fair territory and he would have been called out, which would have negated any chance at a double play because after it hit Young, the ball would be called dead.  McCarver: "Either way, had he run, the Tigers would have been much, much better off."  That you Captain Obvious!
• Verlander was so bad last night, even Barry Zito had and RBI single.  Immediately after, the Giants fans chanted "BARRY!  BARRY!  BARRY!"  Joe Buck commented that, even though it had been awhile, this park has chanted that before.  McCarver: "For Barry Manilow.  At a concert."  I was looking at my phone when he said it and my head shot up.  Surely that was a joke.  Even McCarver has a sense of humor.  Right?!?!  Wrong.  He was dead effing serious.  This is a guy hired to talk about baseball on the biggest stage in the world.  And he gives you Barry Manilow.  For those of you still wondering, Joe Buck was talking about that one dude who used to play for the Giants...Barry Bonds.  Duh.
• In one at bat, Pablo Sandoval accidentally let go of his bat while finishing his swing.  The bat slammed into the concrete wall by the dugout, breaking it down by the knob.  McCarver: "That is a RARITY!  How many times do you see that [the bat breaking by the knob]?!?!"  Well, Tim, you don't.  Unless, that is, a guy lets go of his bat after his swing and it slams into a concrete wall.  This guy is unreal...
• As Tim Lincecum went down to the bullpen to warm up: "Lincecum never needs more that 15 pitches to warm up.  Even when he starts."  OK, this in itself is not dumb.  And it may be true.  But, McCarver left it at that.  No explanation.  Is this common knowledge?  Does he have a source?  For the record, after the commercial break, he changed "never" to "rarely" reaffirming the fact that McCarver just made it up in the first place.
• Lincecum threw great.  For those of you who don't know, Lincecum was relegated to the bullpen late in the year after being one of the best starters in the game for the last 4 years.  In the middle of his performance, McCarver dropped this wisdom on us: "There is a 2-fold reason for Lincecum to pitch well in the World Series: 1) to restore his confidence so he can; 2) get back in the starting rotation next year."  What.  The.  F@#k?  I've got one reason for Lincecum to pitch well - to help his team win the World Effing Series.  That is all.
• As Lincecum went full count on someone, up by 5 runs: "He HAS to throw a fastball here."  Slider.  Strike 3.  Good call Tim.
• With Lincecum still on the hill, McCarver started talking about the "illusions of strikes".  Actually he said it about 20 times.  I still have no clue what he is talking about.  I even rewound it to listen again, because I was so confused.  Still nothing.  Let's move on.
• "Most pitchers are 'individual' and not 'team' guys.  By the very nature of their position.  It's a very individual position.  Nothing happens until the pitcher puts the ball in play."  I don't even know where to start.  This has to be one of the dumbest statements ever.  First off, right field is just as "individual" as pitching.  In fact, all positions are "individual".  Baseball is often described as an "individual team game".  McCarver's logic is pitchers are individual because they control the pace of the game.  Aren't quarterbacks the same?  So, by McCarver's logic (an oxymoron) all quarterbacks are "individual" and not "team" guys too.  Oh, wait, my bad, I forgot McCarver doesn't think before he speaks.  Perhaps he doesn't think at all...
• With Lincecum now dominating the Tigers: "The Tigers are having trouble because they don't have anyone in the American League that throws like Lincecum."  Tim, no one, anywhere, has anyone that throws like Lincecum.  But you'd have to actually pay attention to baseball to know that.  They call him "The Freak" for a reason.

And that is all in Game 1.  I left some things out because they were dumb, but perhaps not dumb enough.  Although, almost everything McCarver says is dumb.  You know it's bad when he makes a comment that makes sense, and it catches you completely off-guard.  Can't wait to watch Game 2 on mute.

The Wizard of Westwood

Issue: College basketball already??

Short Answer: Sort of...

Reasoning: I was dallying around on Facebook the other day (which means I was so bored I didn't know what to do with myself), when I came across the following video.  Now, before you click play, let me warn you, it is long (something like 17 minutes), and the star of the video, John Wooden, may ramble from time to time (the guy lived to be almost 100...give him a break).  So, for those of you who do not have 17 minutes (I know you are reading this at work right now, soooo, c'mon, let's be honest), I will summarize for you after the video.

The first thing I notice is the title: The difference between winning and succeeding.  Most people would think they go hand-in-hand.  Mr. Wooden believes differently, and he does a great job explaining the difference.  A few other points worth noting:

• "Mr. Webster defined [success]: as the accumulation of material possessions or the attainment of a position of power or prestige...but in my opinion [that is] not necessarily indicative of success."
• "Dad tried to teach me and my brothers that you should never try to be better than someone else...always learn from others."
• "Never cease trying to be the best you can be - that's under your control.  If you get too engrossed and involved and concerned in regard to the things over which you have no control, it will adversely affect those things over which you have control."
• Mr. Wooden's definition of success: "Peace of mind attained only through self-satisfaction in knowing you made the effort to do the best of which you're capable."
• "Your reputation is what you are perceived to be; your character is what you really are."
• Mr. Wooden's number one rule in life: "Never be late."
• Mr. Wooden's advice to young coaches: "Don't run practices late.  Because you'll go home in a bad mood.  And that's not good, for a young married man to go home in a bad mood.  When you get older, it doesn't make any difference."
• "And I say to you, in whatever you're doing, you must be patient."
• "I think our tendency is to hope things will turn out the way we want them to much of the time.  But we don't do the things that are necessary to make those things become reality."
• "Don't whine.  Don't complain.  Don't make excuses.  Just get out there, and whatever you're doing, do it to the best of your ability."
• "My idea is that you can lose when you outscore somebody in a game.  And you can win when you're outscored."
• "I used to say that when a game is over, and you see somebody that didn't know the outcome, I hope they couldn't tell by your actions whether you outscored and opponent or the opponent outscored you."
• "I've had some players the could and wouldn't [pass the basketball], and I've had some that would and couldn't."

Those are the highlights.  What I can't show in my synopsis is Mr. Wooden quoting poetry as if he is reading it out of a book, somewhere in his mid-90's.  It's uncanny.  The video is worth the watch, because, in my opinion, anything Mr. Wooden says is worth listening to.  He is the greatest teacher of all time.